We’re An Equal Oppotunity Blog
March 25th, 2008 by ACTivist
Never let it be said that Nova Townhall Blog only worries about the big issues. We worry about the little issues also. Just so long as they are important to our readers. That is why I want to promote some ideas that I believe would be beneficial for Loudoun County residents as well as all Virginians.
I think we should start finding and prosecuting those individuals who leave bags of garbage (Taco Bell, baby diapers, 3rd-me-down clothes, etc.) along side of our roads. If we can’t prosecute to the fullest extent of the law then we should at least find out where they live so as to return their garbage to them as well as a few additional helpings.
How about those individuals who don’t use their turn signals? They have to work to pass inspection and if you need to replace an assembly it runs a minimum of around $1000 so why not use them. The signals actually aid in telling other drivers your intent. Of course if you find someone who refuses to use their signals as they cut you off in traffic, write down their license and call the cops. That is your civic duty and it is a crime related to aggressive driving and reckless endangerment. Of course, I don’t think they can deport you (unless your illegal) but it does carry points and a heavy fine.
I also believe that we should be on the watch for the non-grasscutters. It is the season and we don’t want our neighborhoods looking like the African velt. If they use sheep or goats, turn them in as they are not considered lawnmowers (or pets). Contrary to popular belief, neither are rats.
Nova Townhall is a full service blog and these are just a few of the many issues we believe are important to all citizens. We are here to address YOUR concerns. How may we help you?
This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 25th, 2008 at 9:23 pm and is filed under Culture, Environment. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
March 25th, 2008 at 10:49 pm
Leaving dog droppings for others to step in should be a crime, punishable by 80 hours of service on The Dirtiest Jobs TV show.
We should fine those that throw cigarette butts out of the car window to pay for new road construction. We can call this the “Save Virginia Butts Fund”. Kaine can take over and run this after he leaves office, and he can be affectionately known as the Virginia Butt Head.
Turn signals, what’s the big deal about making known your intent, very few pay attention anyway. Or maybe we should just leave them on all the time, as we eventually will turn, and we don’t wish to offend anyone.
What is wrong with aggressive driving, how else can one be sure to arrive at their destination before everyone else gets to theirs ? What is one supposed to do with this extra time if you don’t drive aggressively, watch a DVD or something ?
No sheep, what’s a lonely Scotsman to do ? Lawn mowers are a big contributor to global warming, so what do you want ACT, icebergs or manicured lawns ? Ever try to barbecue a lawnmower after the summer growing season has ended ? The sheep idea is looking better and better. What we really need is bioengineered lobsters that breath air, eat turf grass, and urinate Miller Lite.
March 26th, 2008 at 12:37 am
Brilliantly forward thinking, I must say!
Dan really needs to become a full time blogger here. If we are going to solve the world’s problems, we need this sort of innovative imagining.
March 26th, 2008 at 7:59 am
instead of Miller lite, how about Guinness, that is more in keeping with the whole lonely Scotsman montage. I prefer the sheep idea for in addition to entertaining the Scotsman, with the world cooling back down we can shear the sheepp and make sweaters.
March 26th, 2008 at 9:32 am
People who don’t use their turn signals are a real annoyance and rather dangerous too. I particularly hate it when people slow down and stop in the middle of the road w/out ever signaling their intentions. I do pay attention to turn signals, as you can tell and I use them. The other pet peeve is people who drive 10-15 under the speed limit on one lane roads for no apparent reason.
March 26th, 2008 at 9:32 am
Jacob,
What would PETA say with global cooling, and a world full of naked sheep?
Maybe they could make up signs for them to wear ” I would rather go naked than wear wool”.
March 26th, 2008 at 9:41 am
“I particularly hate it when people slow down and stop in the middle of the road w/out ever signaling their intentions”
I take your comment to mean that in addition to brake lights and turn signals, we need a slowing down light. Or at the very minimum a little yellow sign in the rear window reading “Lost person on board”.
March 26th, 2008 at 9:55 am
no, of course not, Dan. if you have your turn signal on and you slow down, I assume you are planning to turn. If you float down the road at 5mph and then eventually turn without ever signaling, I find that somewhat disrespectful to other drivers. People do get lost, of course, (including myself), and that’s understandable, but being thoughtless or rude is one of those little things we could use less of.
March 26th, 2008 at 10:39 am
Dan,
“What would PETA say with global cooling, and a world full of naked sheep?”
Fine, we take the cloths from the PETA pukes, at gun point, and give the clothes to the sheep. Then everyone is happy and we would see if the PETA losers “I would rather go naked than wear wool”
March 26th, 2008 at 11:26 am
Jacob, a sheep with any self esteem is not going to be caught dead in polyester..
March 26th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Dan,
Mon Deu! You are right. Polyester is for losers. OK. We’ll skin the PETA idiots and make leather. How’s that?
March 26th, 2008 at 2:45 pm
Jacob,
Sounds too Silence of the Lambs freaky for me.. Besides, I imagine the PETA folks are pretty thin skinned anyway. Because of this, they probably will never be part of the solution.
March 26th, 2008 at 7:59 pm
Dan,
Pick, pick, pick. I offer solutions. All you do is complain. I see the PETA idiots as a resource, and all you do is pick, pick, pick …
March 26th, 2008 at 8:10 pm
You bunch of racists! I got your numbers. Did you forget about the goat? Hum? And no feta on “peta” bread jokes either.
March 26th, 2008 at 10:11 pm
Let me asure you that BOTH sheep and goats are valid grass controls in Western rural Loudoun, friend.
March 26th, 2008 at 11:04 pm
Jacob, Sorry for seeming picky, it is the French and British in me. Because of this, I argue with myself a lot too.
March 27th, 2008 at 8:31 am
The following are my top 16 peeves (call them very minor issues if you’d like, although some are real), in no particular order:
1) People who talk on cell phones while driving, thereby creating a safety hazard.
2) People who fail to use turn signals, thereby creating a safety hazard by assuming others can read their thoughts.
3) People who park cars on their lawns, thereby creating an eyesore.
4) People who park cars on their unmowed lawns, thereby creating a painful eyesore.
5) Suburban houses illegally used as apartment buildings, thereby creating fire hazard and neighborhood property value issues.
6) Politicians who don’t take down their signs a month after election day, thereby creating an eyesore.
7) People who keep chickens as pets in the ‘burbs, thereby creating unpleasant poo and feed-related odors.
9) Schools that don’t permit dodgeball, thereby creating wussy children who turn into even wussier adults.
10) Men who drink soy milk in their lattes, who themselves are the wussy product of schools that did not permit them to play dodgeball. Men should never utter a phrase like “venti soy milk latte” in the first place. To do so, is truly a crime. Men should say, “gimme a cold cuppa joe.”
11) Politicians who do the “thumb thing” when they talk to emphasize their points, thereby making me want to grab said thumbs while yelling “Stop shaking that thing at me!”
12) Democrats who w-h-i-n-e, because, well, that is what they do. Constantly. About everything.
13) People who don’t wipe up their own sweat at the gym, because that is just rude and disgusting.
14) People who do not clean up after their pets or who allow their pets to free range, thereby fouling their neighbors’ shoes when they go out to get their papers.
15) Anyone with fewer than three children who owns a minivan, because such persons illustrate the very height of modern euroweenie-in-America uncoolness. America is a V8 pickup truck drivin’ nation, doggone it!
16) And, related to #15, the preachy, soy-drinking, less than 1% givin’ to charity, cell-phone gabbin’, turn-signal eschewing, dodgeball-hating’ Dem-votin’ people who drive hybrids and want you to preach to you endlessly why you should drive them, too. Just get in the old pickup truck and give it a few revs of glorious American 300+ HP to drown out their tinny voices. Just don’t forget to use your turn signal as you pull out of your space!
March 28th, 2008 at 10:52 am
Soy in a latte? That is blasphemy! Really, isn’t that what foo-foo drinks are for?
March 28th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
Hmmm. Let’s see:
1. Guilty
2. Not guilty
3. Not guilty
4. Not guilty
5. Not guilty
6. N/A
7. Not guilty
8. Not guilty
9. I love dodgeball, esp. Dem’s vs. Rep’s, but you need to leave your guns at home.
10. I like soy milk, but not latte’s.
11. N/A
12. Well, I whine, but a whole lot less than you guys do.
13. Not guilty
14. Not guilty
15. Not guilty
16a. Less preachy than you guys.
16b. Guilty
16c. Way more than 1% ($15K last year)
16d. Guilty
16e. Not guilty
16f. Not guilty
16g. Very guilty
16h. Maybe next car
16i. Just wait, y’all will be soon
16j. Never owned one
Given all that, I think Makin’ and I could be friends! (Not BEST friends, but buddies anyway.)
March 28th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Sorry, inSanity, but the wages of sin is death. Doesn’t matter which sin — big or small.
March 28th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
Jack,
what are you talking about?
Sanity,
“Well, I whine, but a whole lot less than you guys do”, Lets play some dodge ball, we’ll see you whine.
March 28th, 2008 at 8:53 pm
10) Men who drink soy milk in their lattes, who themselves are the wussy product of schools that did not permit them to play dodgeball. Men should never utter a phrase like “venti soy milk latte” in the first place. To do so, is truly a crime. Men should say, “gimme a cold cuppa joe.”
This is known as a metrosexual….and it’s the ruination of a nation.
March 29th, 2008 at 12:21 am
Soy milk ? Isn’t that kind of like drinking snot ?
March 29th, 2008 at 7:48 am
It’s worse than drinking snot, not that I would try either.
March 29th, 2008 at 1:40 pm
haha, I like how you take a break from your whining spree to whine about democrats whining all the time!
re: soy milk, I say don’t knock it till you try it.
politics aside, soy milk is actually pretty good. My girlfriend has the lactose intolerance, so it’s always around. I’d say I prefer it to regular milk now, and I played dodgeball in school, so… It has a nice, sweet flavor. Rice milk is alright, too. It’s no replacement for real cream in coffee, mind you.
March 29th, 2008 at 7:56 pm
Marshmallow,
lactose intolerance is a good reason to drink soy milk. I still do not like it, I have had it in cereal, and found it to have a very strange after taste.
kinda like snot
March 29th, 2008 at 7:57 pm
As for coffee, here here, cream of half and half.
March 30th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
SPMM, I did try it, how else would I know it is analogous to drinking snot ?
Imho, milk comes from a teat. You can squeeze fluids out of just about anything, doesn’t make it milk, chock full of a mammalian mother’s natural goodness.
Coffee - nothing beats a shot of Bailey’s.
March 30th, 2008 at 11:04 pm
I was allergic so the first 2 years of my life was soy milk. The crap back 50+ years ago was WAY different from the stuff they have today. That stuff would make you blow just from the smell much less the taste. It has come a long way but still it’s soy.
Coffee-shot of Jager always makes me come around. Those that put milk products in coffee are girls. Ooops! Sorry, smore. So much for dodgeball.
April 4th, 2008 at 9:23 am
Really, I think there is too much soy around. How it may or may not mimic estrogen is still rather debated, and it may actually increase breast cancer risk in some women. I can’t imagine how it could have tasted worse decades ago; because it is nasty. You can always drink goat’s milk if you are lactose intolerant, Dan, and of course goats meet your requirements. Goat’s milk is easier to digest, too. It doesn’t really taste as bad as soy.
Sanity, thanks for giving more than 1% to charity last year. I was, of course, mocking Barak Obama for the recent news revelation that he is, in fact, rather cheap. As someone put it: “CHANGE: What Barak Obama Gave to Charities in 2007″.
The latte thing was an homage to Denis Leary. He had a good rant about going in a coffee shop and wanting to buy just coffee and not have to go through a bunch of fru-fru nonsense. I am a woman, in fact, but I feel just like Denis. I insist on calling Starbucks drinks small, medium and large. You know “gimme a small coffee, please.” You get fifty questions after that: breakfast blend or yukon bold? do you mean tall, because that’s what we call it? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! Look, just toss me that cup there and I’ll get it my damned self!
April 4th, 2008 at 11:24 am
Hence why men go to 7/11. You get real mud (5 coffee pots poured into 1 and simmered for 17 hours-almost as strong as the Corps) AND you get to pour it yourself….into any container you like. Other than all the cooties on the coffee pots, it just doesn’t get any better than that, tank-ju-berry-much!