[Well serious journalistic style blogging is still not going to be my stock in trade this time of year folks because I just don't have the time. So let this serve as my preemptive apology to all who have been needling me to write stuff and may be saying, "Hey, how come Joe has time to write THIS silly blog post when he won't write the important one I've been asking for for months?!" Sorry about that, but as I've noted before, for $3500 a week with a written guarantee of 90 weeks I WILL be your huckleberry, I promise, but not until then. 'Kay?]
So. What has inspired us to take time out of our busy schedule to sit down and write an original blog post today?
What has inspired us is a series of events that combines a number of my pet issues; including horrific customer service, the United States Postal Service, and bad marketing which is so bad that those who perpetrate it should be stoned, by which I do NOT mean invited into your condo for some musty Hawaiian doobage, but rather tied to the lamppost and struck with bricks until dead.
Some of my commentary here will allude to the employees of the United States Postal Service which, to me, is an overly wordy allusion, so let’s just create a shorthand reference here and call them “Cocksuckers.”
Anyways back in early December I took the initiative to send Christmas cards this year, which with work and personal is a LOT of Christmas cards (and for all of you who did not get one from me, just imagine how huge my contact base must be if YOU did not even make it onto the list. I am talking LEGIONS of Christmas card recipients here.)
A couple of my cards came back, for lack of postage. This is odd, because I double check my stamps before dropping letters in the mail box the same way Rain Man double checks his socks before depositing them in the dresser drawer. There is no way I left off a stamp. Then, in a conversation with a local friend, I heard she had cards come back because the new “holiday” USPS stamps fell off. Well, that made perfect sense to me, because the glue on those stamps did seem flimsy, and as I said I never forget to include a stamp.
The cards that came back had a red ink stamped notice “Returned for lack of postage, when remailing cross out this notice or place stamps over it” where the stamp would have been. So I put on a new stamp and re-mailed. Unfortunately, the re-stamped cards came back.
Charge to Joe so far by the Cocksuckers: 88 cents each and still no delivery.
The next stage in this drama took place last week when I needed to send out the month’s bills, and was also sitting on over $30 worth of the USPS “Holiday” stamps each with an angel’s breath worth of adhesion waiting to surrender to the elements. So I wrote out all the checks and sealed the envelopes and applied my “Holiday” stamps each with a tiny piece of transparent tape holding the stamp onto the envelope by the lower portion.
Lo and behold, today the first of these bill payments came back to me, with a red ink stamp by the Cocksuckers stating “Stamps void when coated, covered, defaced or reused. Return for postage.”
Thus I can expect all of my 20 or so payments to come back, many of which will be late by the time I re-package and resend, and some of which may never be received since I don’t have much faith in the Cocksuckers to really care about whether these are returned in a timely manner. The first which I received back today was to a charity, and some of them were specifically for Haiti, so there you go: The US Government refusing to accept posted instruments which each displayed completely verifiably paid transit costs, returned for the good old government excuse: I shall screw you over because I can, because I work for the government.
Note it should make no difference to the Cocksuckers at USPS. Obviously the stamps have been paid for, and obviously the only reason for putting a piece of tape is because they have been falling off. I get nothing out of having to add extra adhesion. These people are simply looking for a reason to refuse to deliver my letters. Letters arrive wet, they arrive spindled or mutilated, and the USPS ostensibly tries to deliver each. But with their crappy Holiday stamps they take the opportunity to use the little piece of tape as a reason to send it back.
Thanks a lot, Cocksuckers.
The key takeaway from this is, in my view: Never buy anything from the US Government that you don’t absolutely HAVE to buy. Holiday stamps are a total waste of money, and I will end up trashing over $30 in stamps because I was stupid enough to buy them from the Cocksuckers at the USPS.
Also, DO NOT SEND ANYTHING VIA THE UNITED STATES POSTAL SERVICE IF YOU CAN SEND IT ANOTHER WAY.
This is like Obama Motors, friends. Just like you should never, ever buy a car from Chrysler or GM ever again, you should make a full scale effort to avoid doing business with the Cocksuckers at USPS.
Here is a useful vignette for those of you who live in Sterling Park: Go to Costco. On the wall between the food court and the employee cafeteria is a whiteboard listing the sheer efficiency ratings of Costco employees. It’s purely numbers: How many customers was each Costco employee able to check out. Some of them are amazing, and you experience this when you go through the line at Costco, Their job is to do their job and they are very, very good at it.
Compare this to the Sterling Post Office, where more often than not the employee mission seems to be to make each transaction last as long as possible so as to ensure the minimum number of potential customers are served during the course of a day. These are the Cocksuckers whose salary you are paying, and who go out of their way to make your life difficult and, if you were stupid enough to purchase their Holiday stamps, to keep your letters from arriving at the intended destinations. They find ways to avoid delivering your mail, costing you money and costing the people you want to pay money, while also skimming money from your pocketbook the whole time.
Pay your bills online, spend a little more to send your packages with Fed Ex or UPS, and help put the Cocksuckers at USPS out of business.
And throw away those Holiday stamps, they are useless and you have been had.
Thanks for those comments–what a mess.
About two years ago the Sterling postmaster gave an interview to the Loudoun Easterner. Bragged about diversity of his employees. Not a word about us -the customers. Priority on pleasing your superiors in DC, not the public who are victims of this monopoly. I sincerely believe that most workers try very hard but there is a systemic problem –ass kissing bureaucrats and upper management -or lack thereof. We have also had more than a few problems with USPS. Thank heaven for fax, email, internet, etc. Strongly urge all to use mails only as a last resort.
Yeah, on the whole I like my mail carriers, so it pains me to write the above. But Jeezuz, the USPS does a great job making people miserable. I love the guys who deliver our mail, but I hate the ones who send it back for no reason.
Joe,
Buy yourself a glue stick! After you have sealed the envelope and glued on the stamp, put the letters on a wooden chair and sit on them (while you read the WashPost). There’s nothing better than warmth and pressure to make sure everything is securely stuck on.
My post office workers are wonderful. I actually LIKE going there.
I knew better than to tape over a stamp – but I did notice the Holiday stamps had a stickiness issue.
This was the first year I had a Xmas card returned, not for postage but it was stamped “undeliverable as addressed” – which was in fact correct. The card came back totally mutilated about 3 weeks after it had been mailed, I wondered – where had it been? What kind of adventures did it encounter? Is this a good topic for a Children’s book – “Journey in the Mail, Lost and Lonely”?
Yes, pay your bills on-line! Yes – the government is incompetent! Yes – the Post Office is hell on earth! However my postal carrier is a very nice guy and so is my trash crew, one of the benefits of working from home part-time is I get the chance to meet the people that perform these services.
Now I will look for the Costco stats – very interesting rant and information Joe.
As if there aren’t enough problems to go around in this country already. Now Joe has to get us all worked up about whether or not our stamps will stick.
Joe must have gotten a bad batch. None of my mail came back –yet. And the bill payments carrying those Christmas stamps were received. Alternately, I might hazard a guess that someone at the USPS badly calibrated a machine used to put on the cancellation marks or to sort the mail, and some of these self-adhesive stamps may bave been jerked right off the envelope. Just a thought. As a long-time philatelist, I have yet to see any alert in that community over an anomaly with regard to these particular stamps.
Just looked at Consumers Reports re complaints against the USPS over the past couple of months. Complaints all over the place and up the ying yang about various aspects of the service and the courtesy/responses of employees but nary a word about the adhesives on the Christmas stamps.
Wolve = John Stossell?
John Stossel’s possible take? The USPS adjusted the adhesive on those stamps in response to Al Gore’s warnings about global warming. Then it got colder than Hell around here. Result? The stamps fell off the envelopes.
Real story. Neighborhood Watch (NW) was watching the street one afternoon about the time some in Loudoun were having trouble with thefts from their mail boxes. There arrives at the nearby community postal box a very suspicious looking guy. He circled the boxes a couple of times and then began looking up at the facades of the nearby townhouses as if checking to see if anybody was watching. He didn’t see the binoculars of NW trained on him. After awhile, he opened the boxes and started looking through them. He didn’t take anything. He closed up the boxes and left. NW got his car plate number and promptly called the local Post Office to report this suspicious activity to a postal inspector. Turned out the guy going through the boxes was the assistant postmaster…in fact, he was the guy who answered the phone and confessed with a “That would be me.” He was apparently checking to see if his mailman was placing the right mail in the right boxes.
Since this was p[osted yesterday, I feel you have calmed down enough for me to respond to these outlandish accusations againest one of our finest gov’t entities.
You used holiday stamps? What were you thinking? You should have bought a $1,000 of “Forever” stamps if you want to use the USPS. The holiday cards are enough unto themselves. DON’T embellish with holiday stamps and holiday stickers. It is overkill and tacky.
You taped a stamp on? What were you thinking? Never use gluestic but DO use Elmer’s white glue. If you need lessons, I’m a pro.
You stand in line at the USPS? What were you thinking? You can get stamps by mail or at the grocery store. You can get all your mailing needs off the USPS website. That way you just walk in and drop your package at the counter and say “hasta la vesta, baby” on your way out. Everyone in line will be looking at you because they all understand what you are saying. That is why the lines are long and take forever. The clerks love me and are very helpful when I show up because I SPEAK their language and I know what I am doing. Don’t blame the clerks.
The rest of your rant I will give to you. If you really want a sickening feeling at the pit of your stomach as to why USPS service is so costly then I would suggest you talk to your neighbor who works for the USPS. He has got some stories to tell that would make anyone want to go postal! What a waste.
Come on over and we can do some wine and valium. Then you can find time to write your exceptional posts. After all, you know you can always rant to me and then feel good about it afterward. Remember your blood pressure!
When the Civil War started, the USPS canceled the validity of all American stamps and did reprints so those pesky Rebs down South wouldn’t be able to use their own stocks of those stamps to communicate with friends and relatives up North. Well, what else could we do in retaliation after losing both Sumter and First Manassas?!! As usual, the Rebs were unprepared for this retaliatory strike and had to scramble to find the means to print new CSA stamps with the faces of George Washington and Jeff Davis on them. In the meantime, various postmasters around the South began making up their own pre-paid stamps and selling them to the public so the mail could continue. Some of those stamps are still available to collectors. Now, I am wondering what our buddy ACTivist, the unrepetent Rebel, is really up to!!!
Excuse me, Yank, but you have gotten it wrong AGAIN. I get so-o-o tired of having to educate the northernly infirmed. Yes, we did make stamps later. Think of it as buying war bonds and helping out your country. But at first and all during the war it wasn’t really necessary because when we wanted to communicate with somebody, we would do it in PERSON. To do otherwise would be considered rude. (yes, we even snuck over “the line” to your side but not very often. All the good people were already in the South!) HA!
Where are your people from Act?
Well, ACT, I will hand you something here. A big part of the unauthorized exchanges between the Yank and Reb pickets on the front lines in Northern Virginia consisted of Northern newspapers — that is, besides the coffee and sugar and such which the Rebs had so little of. Why the newspapers? Because the stinking Northern MSM journalists printed every military secret they could lay their hands on in Washington and Virginia, and the Rebs got an easy military intelligence product. Looking at the MSM of today, I would have to agree that we Yanks have a hard time learning some things.
Wolve,
Speaking for myself, we only look dumb on the outside!
Cmac,
Depends what time period we are talking. Ancestores are German and Italian (nobility). Actually had uncles back 900 years that ruled Austria and No. Italy. One was a Duke and one was a Cardinal (not the bird or ball player) and they hated each other. Needless to say, I didn’t inheirit nuttin’. Virginia.
Sorry. Had to shovel drive for mama. The Germans love a fight so we came over to due our duty for the right cause. Didn’t work out. Then we settled some up north (Illinois of all places) but rectified that mistake later on and migrated back to the South where we have been happy (well, some of us anyway) ever since.
Now that you know about me, let’s hear about you. Did you really dress your brother up in skirts when you were kids?
So, the darned post office has a mess of flaws. Big deal. Uncle Sam has much more important things to attend to — like running a cracker jack health care system for you and trying to determine how to reconfigure the showers in Navy ships and Marine barracks so that we can maintain proper distance and modesty between gays and straights, not to mention making sure that the polar bears live a good life and finding clever ways to raise your taxes so you don’t even catch on until it’s too late. You peons just have to get your priorities in the right order.
Ancestors (that I know about) floated in from Germany, Lithuania, France, Ukraine (although the border changes could be present day Poland), Amsterdam, and Wales. All eventually settled in PA, most in the Pittsburgh area – my parents meeting in Western PA. You may insert another Pittsburgh rant if you wish!
My brothers are so much older than I that I hardly remember them from my youth……lol!
Wolve, What is your take on the Chmn of the Joint Chiefs of Staff coming out in favor of Don’t ask Don’t tell? Gates too.
Sorry, against Don’t Ask Don’t tell.
Gates and the top commanders? Political prisoners — all except maybe the Commandant USMC.
I can remember my own time on active duty. The enlisted bunks on my ship were stacked three or four high in narrow passageways, with aisles that almost required turning sideways for two to pass and showers for more than one. A lot of those sailors carried the very sharp deck knives which were used for so many of their tasks. When the going was tough and tempers were raw, we had to send the chief petty officers down into the foc’sle to break up the fights. One really bad one was a racial fight in the late 1960’s.
I just cannot imagine a situation in which Boy #1 falls in love with Boy #2 down there and Boy #2 decides he prefers the amorous advances of Boy #3 in the same berthing area. There has always been some sub rosa element of that stuff in any military force, but now we are talking about legitimizing it. Just what the chief petty officers needed — to become sex counselors and referees on top of everything else.
I personally don’t have a big religious thing about gays and their claim of equal rights, although I will admit to being more than a little put off by the aesthetics of it all and I don’t like the idea of having it shoved constantly in my face. But I won’t mince words here. I do think that we should perhaps start thinking a little more about the practical effects of mixing the apples and oranges together in tight and potentially antagonistic situations. War is tough enough without adding more inflamation to an already tense atmosphere.
Of course, some will say that this differs little from the time when we integrated Blacks into the military units. I don’t buy that. Yes, there was a lot of antagonism to deal with then, but that antagonism did not involve a comrade eyeing your behind fondly in the group shower. Can we work something out where nobody bothers anybody else in that way? Maybe. But, then, there was recently a top general in Iraq who decided that a female soldier getting pregnant deliberately so she could get off the firing line was a negative for combat effectiveness and merited punishment. He was slapped down by one of the “political prisoners”
Amazing whereto a rant about the USPS can lead.
I’ll leave for the arms of Morpheus and let Joe revel with his rant about c-suckers at the Sterling postoffice. – Hard to believe that an (I assume) educated person with a wife would use such a crude description.
Don’t Ask Don’t tell should remain as is.
Wolve, IIRC, the scenario you imagined costs us a gun turret and a good sized hole in a ship a few years back.
Oh, man, I can’t even imagine how complicated the “sensitivity” training classes are going to get.
By the way, simply repealing “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” isn’t enough, you’ll have to explicitly allow homosexuality, repeal sodomy and unnatural sex clauses in the UCMJ, etc.
Even us unenlightened dinosaurs back when I served were mostly of the opinion that if you did your duty, didn’t make an issue of it, didn’t hit on subordinates or bunkmates, etc, most really didn’t care if you were gay. (But getting caught having sex in the barracks was pretty much a deal-breaker.)
I’m sure it’s even less an issue now. I suspect most discharges these days are due to flagrant conduct, (that is, caught in the act), and cynical outing by pro-gay groups who “sacrifice their own for the greater good.”
I suspect the issue here isn’t “gays in the military”, it’s “homosexual acts in the military.” Because I really don’t think most soldiers care, as long as it’s not shoved in their faces (um, figuratively speaking.)
The problem will be boundaries. It seems like it’s human nature, but whatever line is drawn, someone will try to push it back further. Allow homosexuals, someone will think that allows homosexual sex in the showers. Then comes the transgenders, (if Stevens Miller has his way) wanting to use women’s bathrooms, and so on.
They talk about the “thousands of discharges” (since ‘92 – I wonder how many hundreds of thousands of discharges for other reasons there were in that time?)
But the flip side of this will be the hundreds or thousands of soldiers who’ll be discharged, or have their careers derailed (get a non-judicial punishment on your 201 file, which can and in the case of officers, absolutely *will* prevent your promotion, which can lead to an early release/bar to re-enlist, thereby preventing someone from reaching retirement) because they’ll be charged with “hate crimes” when they punch some guy (or girl) who makes a pass at them in the shower.
The Unintended Consequences of changing Don’t Ask will almost *certainly* be objectively worse than leaving it as is. IMO.
NoVisa,
Joe is an uneducated dirtbag with a trash mouth. He was one of those kids that started gangs in Jr. High. It has served him well so far because nobody wants to mess with him. Just be careful of the “nice side” because that is the lead in to your disaster!
I thought this post was about the U.S. Male? Oh. Okay.
Squiddy makes a point about the “grabass” deal but it would be much more convoluted then that. At my work we have all the correct PC policies. Homosexuals are open about their deviant lifestyle but stop sure with “petting” or more. This is not condoned. It does feel “in your face” when you are trying to conduct business and there seems to be nothing you can do about it. After all, you must interact to be able to complete your assigned work.
But think about this. In the military you might have a disagreement with another person on an issue (like that never happens) and it escalates to a re-enactment of hand-to-hand combat training. If one of the individuals is either a known homosexual or professes after the fact, without witnesses, how do you prove the fight didn’t stem from hate? And that’s all it takes. Not knowing allows you to do your job. Knowing makes for an eggshell dance at times. After all, there was many cases of military personnel kicking homosexual ass in bathrooms and alleys that helped to promote hate crime laws. Do you think that mindset has changed? Just ask a Marine.
I plan to get me a glue stick, that is good advice.
If I could not rant openly I would hardly ever blog at all, at least as things stand now. If I could get more free quality time there would be the chance of settling down and writing about puppies and stuff, but for now it’ll largely be rants.
Would the post office take the remaining stamps back and trade you stamps that stick, it’s not your fault they don’t stick? They most likely knew there is a problem with them, maybe they did it on purpose hoping the person on the receiving end would pay for the postage.
Joe,
NOT GLUESTIC!!!! Elmer’s white glue. It holds for sure. And you just rant all you want. Heck, it’s your blog. And what’s this talk about puppies and other sissy stuff? By the way, when do I get her again?
Well, waddaya know! Joe may be onto something. I just came up with a book of those 2009 contemporary Christmas stamps where somebody screwed up the perforations. A couple of times I tried to lift a self-adhesive stamp out of the booklet and the stamp next to it got torn. First time I’ve ever had that happen. Looks to me like the USPS did put out a flawed batch this time.