1. It is a pagan holiday (and not the motorcycle group)
2. It is an expensive charity without a line item deduction on the 1040 form
3. It causes obesity in children which could make you the defendant in a lawsuit
4. Unimaginative teenagers with bad/no costumes
5. Destructive menace in the yards
6. Irresponsible rug-rats run amuck
7. Irresponsible adults using street/sidewalks as social gathering points
8. Invisible potential road kill
9. Disruptive nuisance of the household quiet time
10. Wasted bounty because of paranoid parents
11. Makes neighborhood watchers go crazy
12. If I wanted to see your whiny kids, I’d go to YOUR house
13. Ungratefulness from the little free loaders
14. Leftover snot drippings on the front porch pose a bio hazard to residents–clean up is costly time

I would rather the kids come by and rake my yard and give back to the community instead of take-take-take. Where’s my paintball gun?