Yes, the MadLibs are at it again. The prototype for the space shuttle replacement, the X-37B robotic spaceplane, is now in orbit. And the ulterior motive? Surveillance.
Sure, folks. We’re going to put very expensive sensors on the FIRST EVER launch of a new spacecraft, when we have many other launch vehicles available that are extremely reliable. Right. And the WTC buildings were an inside job, too.
No, I still don’t know the Kennedy assassination truth but I got this from a guy who knows a guy that is friends with my sister’s co-worker. Personally, it has to be true. This is good stuff!
Harry Reid wanted to get into politics and at the ripe age of 25 he met someone in the Maricon family. This is a small, ethnic gangster family that said they could help him get started but that he would have to pass initiation to join the family. Initiation consisted of being castrated and since Harry didn’t know what those things did, he agreed to it. I know but that isn’t the half of it. When Obama started dissing Las Vegas, the NY families got highly upset. They went to poor Harry to get him to have his boy Obama shut up but then realized it to be a lost cause because Harry had no balls! They in turn went to their pal “Knuckles” Schumer who has been connected all his life, being groomed and all by Jimmy Hoffa.
Now Chuckie started out on the docks and that is where he met Joe Biden. Back when Biden first started working the docks, Chuck and his friends knew him to be a mouthy sissy. Everyone brought a lunch pail and they used to take Joe’s and beat him in the head with it-hence the name “Lunch Pail Joe”. He allowed the moniker because he so wanted to “belong”. You know the type. Anyway, over the years of being beat in the head with his lunch pail, the hair follicles on his head stopped growing hair. Joe is a very vain person and this balding nature was unacceptable. He went to a hair doctor who told him that all hair follicles above his shoulders were damaged but they could try an experimental procedure (at a discounted rate, of course) that he agreed to. It worked and the hair plugs removed from his anal area was just enough to cover most of his pate. The family changed his moniker to “plugs” but Joe still goes by “lunch pail”.
So Schumer goes to “plugs”, I mean Biden and tells Joe that the Family is pissed and are willing to not only spill the beans about the anal hair transplant, but they also have Obama’s original birth certificate from….you ready….Uganda! It seems that while working as a Peace Corp volunteer, Barry’s mother met Idi Amin and had an affair. Now Idi doesn’t like loose ends like a bunch of little bastards running around from his loins. What usually happens is that he kills the women and eats the kids. He got that from watching the lions daily life on the Nat. Geo channel. Well, another social worker asked Idi if he could have the white girl of which he promised to marry her; adopt the kid and take them far away. Idi agreed to this only because his freezer was full and the frozen kids would last him well into the fall. Biden now knowing this got Obama to lay off Las Vegas and Obama was only to glad to oblige. I just never knew that about the lions.
Did you know that Nancy Pelosi was raised in Baltimore? Okay, did you know her dad use to frequent the red light district there (which was many blocks long back in the days) and he always had Nancy in tow? Listen to this. It seems that Nancy LIKED going with her dad and she got to know all the regulars….and visiting sailors….in the area. It seems that blossoming Nancy was also becoming well known and got “invited” to try out the life. She didn’t want her dad to know so she always told him that she was going “rowing” in the harbor. Her first time out showed her the wealthy side of the business. She didn’t much care about the sex part but the green was great. Needless to say that she would never go with dad anymore to the district but dad kept hearing about “Naughty Nancy” -fortunately never getting to meet her. Good thing, I say.
Well dad got the moving itch and decided to uproot to San Fransisco. Nancy really didn’t want to leave but got a referral and placement at a house in the bay area with a madam called Sally Stanford. They met and became fast friends. One day Nancy approached Sally with 2 problems. The first problem is that some of the men smelled real bad to which her advice was to wear strong perfume-NOT Ode de Toilette. The second problem was that most the men were ugly. The advice given her was to close her eyes and that when she reopened them she could imagine that the man was someone else. I don’t think it ever worked but it looks like the poor girl should practiced a lot. I don’t think they called her “blinky” back then. Anyway, things went well; Nancy made piles of money and all was right with the world.
One day Sally came to Nancy and told her that she wanted to get into politics. Nancy went to her dad but her dad was unwilling to help (being that Sally was a prostitute and all) but he did give Nancy a name of a person that may help. That person was Dianne “The Bulldog” Feinstein. Dianne and Sally made an agreement and Sally became Mayor of Sausalito. What Sally couldn’t do (like that peanut farmer in Georgia) was to own a whorehouse which would be a conflict of interest. She sold the house to Nancy and used the sale proceeds to buy a restaurant. No, I don’t know what they served there. Meanwhile Nancy made oodles of money but got the itch for politics herself after seeing the success of her former madam. Just goes to show you what many “friends” and big breasts can get you. Nancy still owns the house under an LLC (where do you think she got all that money) so that she can still bring home the bacon. I think that Kevin can attest to the Baltimore lore.
Goodness! Did you see that? Everything does come back to Kevin Bacon! It is amazing what you can learn on a blog site. Have a foolish day.
The woman is cracking up before our very eyes. The on going gaffathon, the delusional statements, the outright falsehoods delivered with all the believability of a four year old with their hand in the cookie jar. It would be funny if this woman where not third in the line of Presidential succession. Nancy Pelosi is Joe Biden’s life insurance. How is that for scary? Get a load of this latest howler:
So much for accountability. So much for the most open and honest congress ever. Now, if we want to see the legislation, we have to first enact it as law?!? Hey, Nancy this is not the ’surprise’ in a box of Cracker Jacks. This a law that will heavily impact one sixth of our economy. This is a law that will impact who controls our choices regarding which doctor, what procedure and what medicine we can choose to use. This is a law that will impact how we make our choices near the end of life, the beginning of life, and everything in between. This insane woman expects such a choice to be made in the dark?
What do we do after the bill passes and is signed into law? Yell “Surprise?!?” Nancy Pelosi has more than likely succumbed to dementia, that has been caused by the stress from the task of trying to pull off the greatest con job the world has ever seen. She will go down in the books as the crazy aunt of our congress. We as Americans have witnessed this health care fiasco unfold over this past long year. Time and time again the Democrats shut the Republicans and the American Public out as they schemed behind closed doors, cutting deals to somehow get this travesty signed into law. We as Americans can do better, and should demand better of our government.
It seems that there is one entrepreneur out there willing to take a gamble in today’s crisis environment. Glacier Enterprise LLC is willing to take your stock portfolio at today’s price and hold it for you for 4 or 8 years. You will have to be cryogenically frozen and, depending on your time request, thawed during a time after this nightmare. Your portfolio should have grown back to its near high level of which Glacier will split the gains during your freeze to offset their expenses.
Says Fred Jed, CEO and President, ” this is a win-win oppotunity. It allows people to fore-go the physical ailments involved with worrying about your life savings and it allows us to keep our doors open by at least paying the overhead. Besides which, if your re-thaw is successful, you will be 4 to 8 years younger looking then your pals. And we guarantee our cosmetic line will cover any freezer burn for up to 72 hours!”
Mr. Jed was very candid saying the procedure was made for terminally ill people where future technology would not only be able to cure their illness but also be able to safely and successfully thaw you out without noticable permenant damage. “but we at Glacier are willing to take the chance if you are.” Such optimism in times of anguish is refreshing!
If you are interested, give them a call at 1-888-CHILL ME. You may be glad you did. And if not, you won’t know the difference anyway.
First of all, thanks to Bobby for joining our intrepid band here. Fresh blood is a good thing. I admire Bobby’s pluck and the energy he brings. Now for the other side of the coin …
You are a snob — in a twisted kind of way. Your hero worship of ‘the common working man’ waxes lame and Leninist. Being lame is well … lame! So is being a Leninist. I hope you get the picture.
I have worked construction doing both Carpentry and HVAC. I have dug ditches. I currently work as an engineer in front of a computer doing something you call woman’s work. In short, kiss my behind. I studied long and hard to earn the skills I use today precisely because, having actually done manual labor, I found nothing romantic, overtly manly, or ennobling about doing manual labor. I found it hard, and boring. I also realized any moron could dig a ditch or wield a mop (did that as well). For me, carpentry was interesting, as a hobby.
I look back on my efforts to get the engineering degree as one of the three most difficult things I have ever done. Four years of sustained effort, working into the wee hours. You ridicule this? You are a ignorant. Try getting healthy by going to a plumber when you need a doctor. Try getting your teeth worked on by a stone mason, or a barber. Try getting a job from a janitor or a cashier.
As for the pay, why should a guy wielding a mop get paid as much as a guy who can design factory machines, cars, aircraft or piping systems? Please answer that. Can you?
The rarer the item the more it costs on the open market. Precious stones cost more than glass because glass is easy to get, and plentiful. Finding a ruby is hard work because it is rare. The skill required to wield a mop is common, a Doctor is rare. A pro-caliber ball player is rarer still. The salaries reflect this.
Frankly, I have a question for you, “Why do you think a cashier should be paid minimum wage, as defined by some politician in Washington?” Considering your apparent disdain for Washington, I imagine this answer will be interesting to say the least.
As for your ridiculous assertion that raising minimum wage helps workers or the economy, every time it is raised unemployment goes up, or the rate of hiring decreases, or both. How is this a good thing? Please explain how your greatly self-vaunted experience has lead to a conclusion 180 degrees out of phase with the historical track record of raising the minimum wage?
In the future, kindly refrain from calling me and others cowards or trying to threaten us. First of all, you look like an idiot when you do that. Second of all, none of us are scared by your threats, you only look like a sociopath. Furthermore, what would you do if one of us called you out? Hmmmm?
One last thing. Waxing scatological, or couching your diatribes in the ‘Anglo-Saxon,’ does little to further your case. Getting frustrated because we all don’t bow down and hail your ‘wisdom’ does not help you, it only makes you look weak and even more pathetic than you would look otherwise.
I got this from a retired friend, and for some reason I started thinking about ACT
Yesterday I was at my local Target buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Sheriff, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I’m retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter’s butt and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Target won’t let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.
It seems that talks have begun between Osama-bama and Clinton…..Bill Clinton that is. With Bore-rock being grilled by the liberal press on some very touchy issues and Hilly starting to regain her popularity and charm, it seems that Bill has been causing alot of trouble in the Obama camp. Word has it that there has already been 2 private meetings between BJ and Bore-rock. The discussions alude to how to keep BJ quiet and from doing further harm. A deal is being made as we speak to allow BJ to have the VP spot with Bore-rock if he will just shut-up about these embarrassing issues in Bore-rocks’ past (and present, it would seem).
When BJ was asked if any of this was true, the only thing he had to say was “I can’t comment at this time but I will tell you that if it were to be, Hillary would bow out of the race to support me as any good wife should. And Hillary is a damn good wife!”
Now I don’t know about anyone else but I don’t believe Hilly to be just any old fool. Not when April shows her as being first in this race. I think that BJ is just one big joke.
