novatownhall blog

Remember that time three days ago when the Huckster decided not to pay to run his ads attacking Mitt Romney … and then held a press conference to play them for national media so the media would run them for free?

It was Huckabee at his oiliest, donning the cloak of sanctimony to pronounce himself morally superior to the rest of the political world – while at that moment doing exactly what he said he was above doing.

You might not have to be brain damaged to support Mike Huckabee – but it helps, I would imagine. If you are not brain damaged, you DO have to be mildly inebriated to find the humor in Mike Huckabee simply because there is so much to hate about the man.

Well now comes this unsurprising bit of news from FactCheck:

The ad Huckabee said he decided not to run has now appeared at least three times in Iowa anyway. It accuses Romney of being “dishonest” but shades the facts in the process.

Update, Jan. 4: The ad ran at least 10 times on four different stations in Davenport and Cedar Rapids, Iowa. The Huckabee campaign called those airings a mistake.

Apparently, sailing aloft on the wings of seraphim excuses a LOT of behavior that might otherwise have one marked as a lying sack of s–t. So he’s got that going for him. On the minus side, he’s made himself a pretty fat target for everyone who is not singing “hosanna.”

… and also quite the liar.

To great fanfare he unveiled his Secure America Plan which, on the face of it, seems like a solid statement of an attrition-through-enforcement approach to the illegal alien problem, raising hopes Huckabee had “gotten it.”

For some of us, the plan merely raised eyebrows because it represented a contradiction to much of what the man had said and done while in office.

Sunday morning Chris Wallace called him on it, asking Huckabee to reconcile his Plan with his past statements. Here is the exchange (emphasis added):

WALLACE: … a border fence, for cracking down on employers, for telling illegals to go home.

But last year in an interview, you said something somewhat different. You said this, “I think that the rational approach is to find a way to give people a pathway to citizenship.”

Governor, in your new plan, the only path is to go home and to get on the back of the line, which, of course, would mean years of waiting. Why the change?

HUCKABEE: Well, I don’t think there’s an inconsistency. When I said a pathway, I didn’t say what the pathway was.

I now believe that the only thing the American people are going to accept — and, frankly, the only thing that really makes sense — is a pathway that sends people back to the starting point.

But this idea of the waiting years — no, I don’t agree with that. In fact, look, if we can get a credit card application done within hours, if we can get passports done within days, if we can transact business over the Internet any place in the world within seconds, do a background check instantaneously — it’s our government that has failed and is dysfunctional.

It shouldn’t take years to get a work permit to come here and pick lettuce. So part of the plan that I have is that we seal the borders. You don’t have amnesty and sanctuary cities. You do have a pathway that gets you back home.

But that pathway to get back here legally doesn’t take years. It would take days, maybe weeks, and then people could come back in the workforce.

Let me tell you why that’s important. Two reasons. Number one, the American people say, “Do something. Do it now. We don’t want to have this country ignoring the illegal problem.” I get it.

Secondly, I want people who are in this country to hold their heads up high. You know, right now there are a lot of people who really are here because they’re trying to feed their families. I don’t begrudge them that.

If anyone had any doubts about the Huckster’s sincerity on this issue, consider them confirmed.

Either he is selling pie in the sky to illegal aliens, saying we are going to quickly revamp USCIS in such an amazing manner that parting the Red Sea will seem like a party trick in comparison, or else he is selling the citizens of this nation a load of crap. In fact he is doing both – but the “heads up high” phrase is our tip off that the only practical result we could expect from a Huckabee presidency would be exactly what the Senate tried to ram down our throats in June: Instant amnesty. If you’re here “illegally” the only way you’re going to be able to hold your head up high is if you ain’t here illegally anymore.

“Comprehensive immigration reform” should in reality be referred to as “semantic immigration reform” because it’s solution to the problem consists in simply applying a new label to the scofflaws, calling them “legal” rather than “illegal.” This is the ultimate goal of the open borders crowd and would be without a doubt the easiest “solution” to the problem to enact.

That’s why those who support the rule of law in this matter are going to need to be perpetually vigilant: The instant amnesty apple is hanging so close that the open borders folks can practically taste it and it is driving them nuts. They are definitely not going to quit.

If the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse are indeed bearing down on us, scrolls are being opened in the heavens and Huckabee somehow manages to get elected president, there are still going to be millions of people waiting in line to enter this country legally and USCIS still chugging along with the efficiency of a coal-powered lawnmower. When it becomes apparent that Huckabee’s little vignette of illegal aliens traveling home, clearing the immigration process in “days, maybe weeks” and being back here with their heads held high is complete nonsense, you can rest assured the Huckster will put on a full court press to ensure that last part of the fable comes true no matter what.